Tears

Call it animal instinct. I hate to show weakness in front of people and maybe I have been trained by men to think of tears as a sign of weakness.

I hate to cry in front of people.

What I hate even more is to cry in front of my ex-es even if it's not related to them. Nobody including me needs to remember past visions of me crying over a broken relationship.

I came back home yesterday and thought about why I chose to give up certain chapters of my life. If it was so apparent to me, why couldn't I communicate it?

Maybe I was so upset at that time that it didn't come out right. I came back home and thought about it.

I still decided I had made the right decision. The reasons are so many I won't even attempt to bore you.

I would say this much though:

I realised if we really wanted something, we'd fight for it and make it happen even if the odds were not all clear. Not having the heart to fight probably means we 'don't want it enough or want it at all.

I'd rather be dead tired and happy than to be dead tired and dead unhappy.