Of past, friends and poetry

Surprise surprise...I actually can't sleep! Not exactly the best thing to so as I have a 9 am meeting tomorrow. So I am gonna ramble all over the place.

I told a friend I was in Toa Payoh for dinner..she made a wild guess I was meeting Mr W.

"Don't tell me you met W for dinner!"

"Actually you are not that far off...I met B for dinner.''

"Who's B?''

"The one before W...you are one boyfriend away."

*Laughs*

I am glad I can sit down for dinner with B and talk nicely. For a while, we were not able to do so. In fact, I am able to do so with all from my past except for 2 persons. One I don't know where he is...the other well..best not to antagonise in case I upset him even more.

I am truly blessed to have friends who care and love. Because I know it's a blessing....sometimes I don't know how to tell them that love and care can hurt too. It's worse because you know their good intentions and you can't bring yourself to tell them it hurts. The more you care about the person, the more it hurts when the love they presume is right for you, hurts you. You can't call it suffering because it comes from good intentions. Yet, it drives a nail into your heart...again and again...till one day...you are not sure if you know how to receive it anymore.

I always had one regret...that is I was not there for my buddy gal during her struggling times when she first started work. It's something I wore on my heart for a long time and still do today. I felt it especially when another friend whom I cherished...gave me a cold hand when I needed her support. That picture somehow never left my mind. Things seemed never the same again.

That is why I am relieved that while I think the cracks are there...things are getting better with buddy gal. I am so proud of her and am so happy for her.

It happened again. Right songs at the right time or perhaps I should say wrong songs at the wrong time. It's so accurate that it scares me.

As I was swimming today..these words flowed into my mind...any aspiring songwriters who can put a tune to it? :)

You can say a thousand words
Beautiful enough to move mountains
You can bring me the most precious gifts
From many a farwaway lands

You can paint me a gallery of portraits
A sea of love and adoration
You can sweep me off my feet
Bring me to the highest of heavens

But baby I have come to learn
Words don't make promises
Gifts don't last forever
With time they fade to oblivion

Give me a hand to hold in spring
To watch the blooming flowers
Give me a river of passion
To flow in the heat of summer

Give me a shoulder to lean on
For the lovely walk in autumn
Give me the warmth I desire
In the cold of winter

Give me a heart
Whose door can be opened
Give me the simple truth
Where pride does not matter

Cos baby
Words don't make promises
Gifts don't last forever
Sometimes what you need ain't just love

@-;--