5am

I hope I won't spook you with this story that I am going to tell which happened to me.

I stayed up till 5.30 am the other morning as I couldn't get to sleep so I wrote. At about 5 am, I heard a loud thud.

Now, I have stayed up late very often. Yet, something was different that morning. I felt the chills after that loud thud. I felt shivers down my back and I felt very uneasy. I was a little surprised at why because I couldn't find a reason to.

Later when I came home, I found out a guy jumped from my block in the morning...

....probably during the time I heard the loud thud.


Oh gosh.

People, I can't tell you how spooked and cold I felt hearing the news. I had to watch a lot of mindless TV to get my mind off it.

When I think about it, I wonder how he felt at that instant he decided to take the step off the ledge.

I remember once, when I had also stared out the window and contemplated jumping out of it. The reasons for it? I don't want to go into it here. It's over but let's just say I was young and depressed.

We all say it takes more courage to live than to take your own life.

I agree.

Yet, I can also tell you...to take that step off the ledge takes a world of courage too, for that instant at least. I didn't have that courage and that's why I am here today. I am grateful for it.

I heard he's Malay. For him to choose to end his life on Hari Raya...he must have had great sadness.

May his soul rest in peace.