Maybe no one will read this but frankly this is more for myself...to remember 2009 years later.
2009 marks the end of the "2" digit in front for my age. Sigh.
It is in receiving the impending "3" that I realised that there was so much more I could have tried and done in my 20s - glorious 20s. It is with this that I hope to make the 30s even more exciting and fulfilling.
These were the things that made 2009 special:
1) Yoga
Finally did my Hot TT Training in October and am very glad I did it. It took me back onto the spiritual path and taught me many things about myself. It took me deeper into practice and now yoga isn't just about asanas anymore. It is because of this that God means much more and how I come to see how much I am loved and how much I love Him.
I look forward to Patrick's TT and Lama Murut's course next year. Am so blessed that I get to do it before I go to Korea.
2) Fansong project
So I did the fansong project on a crazy idea but never did I expect that Yoochun would see it and that it would garner this much response. This is definitely a milestone in fandom lol
3) Writing
Got writing for E mag so that was good. Not so good for my fiction side though. Really need to pick up on this part.
4) Organising Klub Party
Yet another crazy idea but 9 jan looks promising..hope this is the beginning of more.
2009 was a year that zoomed past. A year where much happened and shifting in between phases happened. Maybe it is but just a transition for 2010, where a lot is going to happen.
I can only hope that God will be with me and that I will do what is right.
Goodbye 2009, hello 2010~
Sunday, January 03, 2010
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Goose's Dream
I really really like the lyrics of this song...
A Goose’s Dream / A Swan’s Dream
Translation by x3Yesung of Soompi
I have a dream,
Even if I’m thrown away or ripped to shreds
Deep in my heart
I have a dream as precious as gem
If by chance, without a reason,
Somebody ridicules me behind my back
I should be patient
I would wait just for that day.
As you always worry,
You say that foolish dreams are poisonous.
Just like a book that tells us about the end of the world
There’s the reality that we can’t turn back already
Yes I have a dream.
I believe in that dream
Please watch over me
Standing in front of that cold wall called fate
I can firmly face it
One day I will pass over that wall
And be able to fly
As high as the sky
This heavy thing called life can’t tie me down
At the end of my life, on the other day that I can smile, let’s be together
Yes I have a dream.
I believe in that dream
Please watch over me
Standing in front of that cold wall called fate
I can firmly face it
One day I will pass over that wall
And be able to fly
As high as the sky
This heavy thing called life can’t tie me down
At the end of my life, on the other day that I can smile, let’s be together
Yes I, I have a dream
I believe in that dream.
Please watch over me
Standing in front of that cold wall called fate.
I can firmly face it
One day I will pass over that wall
And be able to fly
As high as the sky
This heavy thing called life can’t tie me down
At the end of my life, on the other day that I can smile, let’s be together
거위의 꿈
인순이
난 난 꿈이 있었죠
버려지고 찢겨 남루하여도
내 가슴 깊숙히 보물과 같이
간직했던 꿈
혹 때론 누군가가
뜻 모를 비웃음
내 등뒤에 흘릴때도
난 참아야 했죠 참을수 있었죠
그 날을 위해
늘 걱정하듯 말하죠
헛된 꿈은 독이라고
세상은 끝이 정해진 책처럼
이미 돌이킬수 없는
현실이라고
그래요 난 난 꿈이 있어요
그 꿈을 믿어요 나를 지켜봐요
저 차갑게 서 있는
운명이란 벽앞에
당당히 마주칠 수 있어요
언젠가 난 그벽을 넘고서
저 하늘을 높이 날을수 있어요
이 무거운 세상도
나를 묶을순 없죠
내 삶의 끝에서
나 웃을 그날을 함께해요
그 꿈을 믿어요
나를 지켜봐요
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Road of Lost Innocence
There's one thing I love about books. Be it places or minds, they bring you on journeys you haven't had the chance to or couldn't take even if you wanted to. This is why I admire writers and even more so those who make the effort to take their readers on a wondrous journey.
The book that I would like to introduce, however, is not a journey for the faint- hearted.
It was a book I had not planned to buy. It was simply in the 3 for 2 stash in Borders. I had bought it because I thought maybe one day I would need to read it. Indeed that chance presented itself and I finally read The Road of Lost Innocence by Somaly Mam.
Taken from the Somaly Mam Foundation site:
"A riveting, raw, and beautiful memoir of tragedy and hope."
Born in a village deep in the Cambodian forest, Somaly Mam was sold into sexual slavery by her grandfather when she was twelve years old. For the next decade she was shuttled through the brothels that make up the sprawling sex trade of Southeast Asia.
Trapped in this dangerous and desperate world, she suffered the brutality and horrors of human trafficking - rape, torture, and deprivation - until she managed to escape with the help of a French aid worker. Emboldened by her newfound freedom, education, and security, Somaly blossomed but remained haunted by the girls in the brothels she left behind.
Written in exquisite, spare, unflinching prose, The Road of Lost Innocence recounts the experiences of her early life and tells the story of her awakening as an activist and her harrowing and brave fight against the powerful and corrupt forces that steal the lives of these girls. She has orchestrated raids on brothels and rescued sex workers, some as young as five and six; she has built shelters, started schools, and founded an organization that has so far saved more than four thousand women and children in Cambodia, Thailand, Vietnam, and Laos. Her memoir will leave you awestruck by her tenacity and courage and will renew your faith in the power of an individual to bring about change.
My thoughts on it:
When I first read the book, I was a little apprehensive. I had just read another memoir that had been less than beautifully written despite an interesting story.
This is a book that does not seek to impress with flowery writing. After all, the content itself is enough to keep the reader occupied. I wish I knew French so that I could read the book in its original text. However, I don't so I would have to be content with the English version
And contented I was.
I found my heart being wrenched at many points and at some, I could feel the tear ducts being squeezed. There are things that people like us, who have the fortune of living in peace and have access to material comforts, can never understand. There are horrors that we will never be able to imagine even if we tried. How can we possibly understand what is like to be sold like livestock and tortured like a slave
The book begins with:
"1n 1986, when I was sold to a brothel as a prostitute, I was about sixteen years old. Today there are many far younger prostitutes in Cambodia. There are virgins for sale in every large town; to be sure of their virginity, the girls are sometimes as young as five or six.
In Cambodia, and throughout South-East Asia, tens of thousands of children are forced into prostitution each year. They are raped and beaten. Many are killed."
And that's only the beginning. It is merely the miniscule tip of the iceberg that is the story (or should I say, stories?)
It is easy to be indifferent. I won't say more but I greatly recommend this book if you are ready to open your eyes to another kind of life, another side of this world we live in - one that is full of injustice, darkness and terror. I am sure this is not the only one of its kind but it will shake you.
It shook me, for sure.
"A riveting, raw, and beautiful memoir of tragedy and hope."
Born in a village deep in the Cambodian forest, Somaly Mam was sold into sexual slavery by her grandfather when she was twelve years old. For the next decade she was shuttled through the brothels that make up the sprawling sex trade of Southeast Asia.
Trapped in this dangerous and desperate world, she suffered the brutality and horrors of human trafficking - rape, torture, and deprivation - until she managed to escape with the help of a French aid worker. Emboldened by her newfound freedom, education, and security, Somaly blossomed but remained haunted by the girls in the brothels she left behind.
Written in exquisite, spare, unflinching prose, The Road of Lost Innocence recounts the experiences of her early life and tells the story of her awakening as an activist and her harrowing and brave fight against the powerful and corrupt forces that steal the lives of these girls. She has orchestrated raids on brothels and rescued sex workers, some as young as five and six; she has built shelters, started schools, and founded an organization that has so far saved more than four thousand women and children in Cambodia, Thailand, Vietnam, and Laos. Her memoir will leave you awestruck by her tenacity and courage and will renew your faith in the power of an individual to bring about change.
My thoughts on it:
When I first read the book, I was a little apprehensive. I had just read another memoir that had been less than beautifully written despite an interesting story.
This is a book that does not seek to impress with flowery writing. After all, the content itself is enough to keep the reader occupied. I wish I knew French so that I could read the book in its original text. However, I don't so I would have to be content with the English version
And contented I was.
I found my heart being wrenched at many points and at some, I could feel the tear ducts being squeezed. There are things that people like us, who have the fortune of living in peace and have access to material comforts, can never understand. There are horrors that we will never be able to imagine even if we tried. How can we possibly understand what is like to be sold like livestock and tortured like a slave
The book begins with:
"1n 1986, when I was sold to a brothel as a prostitute, I was about sixteen years old. Today there are many far younger prostitutes in Cambodia. There are virgins for sale in every large town; to be sure of their virginity, the girls are sometimes as young as five or six.
In Cambodia, and throughout South-East Asia, tens of thousands of children are forced into prostitution each year. They are raped and beaten. Many are killed."
And that's only the beginning. It is merely the miniscule tip of the iceberg that is the story (or should I say, stories?)
It is easy to be indifferent. I won't say more but I greatly recommend this book if you are ready to open your eyes to another kind of life, another side of this world we live in - one that is full of injustice, darkness and terror. I am sure this is not the only one of its kind but it will shake you.
It shook me, for sure.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
He's Just Not That Into You
He's Just Not That Into You is just about one of the best books I have ever read when it comes to relationships. In fact, it's one of the best things I have ever done for myself.
Which is why I was a little sceptical when the movie came out. And yep, they killed it. When I saw the ending, I knew the film HAD to have been filmed by a man.
I saw the show with a friend from overseas- someone who's older, dated guys of different nationalities from me and stayed in cities I have never been. Nonetheless, our pre-movie dinner proves that it doesn't matter where you come from, live in or date. The kinda bullshit that men offer when they are just not that into you is about as universal as the women who would believe that bullshit. Heck, it's about as universal as love itself or perhaps I should use sex. That's probably age old universal.
We have both been through the same heartaches, craziness and embarrassment. While we both hope we are a little smarter, chances are we fear would do the same. And yes, we both read that book.
Which is also why we were both disappointed with the ending. The movie starts off with saying that as little girls, we had been educated that guys who do bad things to us actually do it because they like us. Then, they go on to dispense nuggets of advice on how that is not true. That was barely following the spirit of the book. If that's the case, why give it a Hollywood happy ending? A case of "ah let's just give the women what they want"? You guys are just being the very same people the movie disses in front!
What made the book valuable is how it helped women to recognise that when a guy doesn't call, marry and give a shit, he really doesn't give a shit. However, with the movie's ending, all the director and scriptwriters did was to validate that the guy who hasn't proposed (and probably never will) will get on his knees one day, that the player who has been around the block will suddenly realise that YOU are the one. Trust me, dear director and scriptwriter, most women who watch this movie are going to hear more of the girl's "I'm the exception" than the fact that SHE IS THE EXCEPTION.
The movie totally failed the spirit of the book. This may just be my judgement but I wasn't alone in thinking so.
And to add to it...HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU, ladies and maybe with current times, I should just add SHE as well.
Which is why I was a little sceptical when the movie came out. And yep, they killed it. When I saw the ending, I knew the film HAD to have been filmed by a man.
I saw the show with a friend from overseas- someone who's older, dated guys of different nationalities from me and stayed in cities I have never been. Nonetheless, our pre-movie dinner proves that it doesn't matter where you come from, live in or date. The kinda bullshit that men offer when they are just not that into you is about as universal as the women who would believe that bullshit. Heck, it's about as universal as love itself or perhaps I should use sex. That's probably age old universal.
We have both been through the same heartaches, craziness and embarrassment. While we both hope we are a little smarter, chances are we fear would do the same. And yes, we both read that book.
Which is also why we were both disappointed with the ending. The movie starts off with saying that as little girls, we had been educated that guys who do bad things to us actually do it because they like us. Then, they go on to dispense nuggets of advice on how that is not true. That was barely following the spirit of the book. If that's the case, why give it a Hollywood happy ending? A case of "ah let's just give the women what they want"? You guys are just being the very same people the movie disses in front!
What made the book valuable is how it helped women to recognise that when a guy doesn't call, marry and give a shit, he really doesn't give a shit. However, with the movie's ending, all the director and scriptwriters did was to validate that the guy who hasn't proposed (and probably never will) will get on his knees one day, that the player who has been around the block will suddenly realise that YOU are the one. Trust me, dear director and scriptwriter, most women who watch this movie are going to hear more of the girl's "I'm the exception" than the fact that SHE IS THE EXCEPTION.
The movie totally failed the spirit of the book. This may just be my judgement but I wasn't alone in thinking so.
And to add to it...HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU, ladies and maybe with current times, I should just add SHE as well.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Making Differences
We must not, in trying to think about how we can make a big difference, ignore the small daily differences we can make which, over time, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee.
- Marian Wright Edelman
Eve Notebook - Fancy Salad
A not so pretty attempt of my fancy salad...didn't get the feta cheese I wanted so the leaves didn't sit as nicely as I would like..
Monday, January 12, 2009
Lots of People...
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
- Oprah Winfrey
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Perfection...Not
I was watching Bleach and found this surprising piece of gem in one of the dialogues -from one of the characters I dislike, no less...a weirdo in fact...but I liked this particular segment:
I liked it because it presented a different view on perfection, one that is not unique to scientists but to all human beings in general. We spend so much time of pursuing perfection that sometimes it makes one wonder if it's really necessary?
A friend of mine once said that he doesn't want to have all his wishes fulfilled as it would mean the time for death. He wants to achieve all but one wish. Then, there would be motivation for living. When that final wish has been completed, then it would be time to go. Kinda like the perfection theory above isn't it?
"There is no such thing as perfect in the world.
That may sound cliche but it's the truth.
The average person admires perfection and seeks to obtain it.
But, what's the point of achieving perfection?
There is none. Nothing. Not a single thing.
I loathe perfection!
If something is perfect, then there is nothing left.
There is no room for imagination,
No place left for a person to gain additional knowledge or abilities
Do you know what that means?
For scientists such as ourselves, perfection only brings despair.
It is our job to create things more wonderful than anything before them,
But never to obtain perfection."
I liked it because it presented a different view on perfection, one that is not unique to scientists but to all human beings in general. We spend so much time of pursuing perfection that sometimes it makes one wonder if it's really necessary?
A friend of mine once said that he doesn't want to have all his wishes fulfilled as it would mean the time for death. He wants to achieve all but one wish. Then, there would be motivation for living. When that final wish has been completed, then it would be time to go. Kinda like the perfection theory above isn't it?
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Yet Another Milestone
15 Dec 2009 marks another milestone towards the dream.
It's a great feeling to know that when you do something you love, the universe will move things for you. Being voted by peers means even more.
May the next milestone by Jun 2009 be of finding a successful agent.
Thank you God, thank you universe...feel very loved!
It's a great feeling to know that when you do something you love, the universe will move things for you. Being voted by peers means even more.
May the next milestone by Jun 2009 be of finding a successful agent.
Thank you God, thank you universe...feel very loved!
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
The Heart of Giving
This thought occurred to me recently. So often, we think of the people who give as generous. I realized recently that the heart to give is not so much an act of generosity, but more an act of the acknowledgement of abundance.
Let's not talk about people who give for recognition. Let's talk about the people who give because they feel they have enough and so they want to share their happiness with other people. Hence, if the desire to give rises, I think it's a good sign for the giver. It means the giver feels that he or she has enough to spread some around. To me, it's a sign that the giver's life is in good hands, good shape.
Therefore, the act of giving is not only an act of kindness, but also validation to oneself that "Hey I have a good life!"
Now, wouldn't that be nice to know?
Let's not talk about people who give for recognition. Let's talk about the people who give because they feel they have enough and so they want to share their happiness with other people. Hence, if the desire to give rises, I think it's a good sign for the giver. It means the giver feels that he or she has enough to spread some around. To me, it's a sign that the giver's life is in good hands, good shape.
Therefore, the act of giving is not only an act of kindness, but also validation to oneself that "Hey I have a good life!"
Now, wouldn't that be nice to know?
Monday, December 01, 2008
The Road to Happiness Rockefeller Style
The road to happiness lies in two simple principles: find what it is that interests you and that you can do well, and when you find it put your whole soul into it - every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have.
- John D. Rockefeller
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Child Warrior
Every so often, we complain about the things we don't have and how tough life is. We complain about our families and feel defeated when life doesn't go our way. Yet, there are also people who can look at life in such wonderful light and face lack with such strength.
This is one of the most moving stories I have come across this year. Hearing her broke my heart, warmed it and encouraged my soul all at the same time. God bless the child for maturity beyond her years, her strength and ability to find happiness even in a situation where many would find despair.
Please listen to what Esther Kim has to say about her family in this video.
She comes on at about 09:00:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgigkOv9g6Y&feature=related&fmt=18
Her story continues here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpGUZMNmp4U&feature=related&fmt=18
May she always stay strong and happy!
This is one of the most moving stories I have come across this year. Hearing her broke my heart, warmed it and encouraged my soul all at the same time. God bless the child for maturity beyond her years, her strength and ability to find happiness even in a situation where many would find despair.
Please listen to what Esther Kim has to say about her family in this video.
She comes on at about 09:00:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgigkOv9g6Y&feature=related&fmt=18
Her story continues here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpGUZMNmp4U&feature=related&fmt=18
May she always stay strong and happy!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
Today has got to be one of the happiest days of my life. I would even cry out of happiness but I am not for now. I would save it for another day. Trust me, the person inside is crying.
Today, I felt what it was like to be really happy, to feel like the world is a wonderful place. Never mind the people who may irritate, today I felt happy enough to feel that it doesn't matter at all.
Discovering writing is one of the most important developments in my life so far and taking real steps to make it a reality has been of tantamount importance to me.
Today, I got a much needed vote of confidence for my prologue from someone whom I respect- an ex-literary agent and published author. She said she loved it, writing was good, she expected the rest to be good and wanted me to show her more.
Never mind that the story hasn't been fully edited or that it's not reached publishing stage yet. The vote of confidence from a professional was enough to brighten my day. It feels like I am taking real steps into making my dreams a reality.
For that, I would like to shout thank you to God, the universe and all the people who have helped me so far. Thank you universe, for being so kind to me. I feel truly blessed and very loved.
Thank you so so much!
Today, I felt what it was like to be really happy, to feel like the world is a wonderful place. Never mind the people who may irritate, today I felt happy enough to feel that it doesn't matter at all.
Discovering writing is one of the most important developments in my life so far and taking real steps to make it a reality has been of tantamount importance to me.
Today, I got a much needed vote of confidence for my prologue from someone whom I respect- an ex-literary agent and published author. She said she loved it, writing was good, she expected the rest to be good and wanted me to show her more.
Never mind that the story hasn't been fully edited or that it's not reached publishing stage yet. The vote of confidence from a professional was enough to brighten my day. It feels like I am taking real steps into making my dreams a reality.
For that, I would like to shout thank you to God, the universe and all the people who have helped me so far. Thank you universe, for being so kind to me. I feel truly blessed and very loved.
Thank you so so much!
Monday, November 24, 2008
Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
I accidentally came across this song when I was watching the fantastic lyrical performance by Katee and Joshua on SYTYCD. It's really beautiful when you can dance your heart out like that. Check out the dance here:
Which then led me to the song used...a touching song by John Mayer. Love it when music speaks to you.
Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
by John Mayer
It's not a silly little moment,
It's not the storm before the calm.
This is the deep and dying breath of
This love that we've been working on.
Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms.
Nobody's gonna come and save you,
We pulled too many false alarms.
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
I was the one you always dreamed of,
You were the one I tried to draw.
How dare you say it's nothing to me?
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw.
I'll make the most of all the sadness,
You'll be a bitch because you can.
You try to hit me just to hurt me
So you leave me feeling dirty
Because you can't understand.
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room.
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Which then led me to the song used...a touching song by John Mayer. Love it when music speaks to you.
Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
by John Mayer
It's not a silly little moment,
It's not the storm before the calm.
This is the deep and dying breath of
This love that we've been working on.
Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms.
Nobody's gonna come and save you,
We pulled too many false alarms.
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
I was the one you always dreamed of,
You were the one I tried to draw.
How dare you say it's nothing to me?
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw.
I'll make the most of all the sadness,
You'll be a bitch because you can.
You try to hit me just to hurt me
So you leave me feeling dirty
Because you can't understand.
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room,
Burning room.
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?
Saturday, November 01, 2008
The Design of Your Life
A few observations have occurred to me recently. While my mind is in a jumble, here's an attempt to make some sense out of it.
I have always been taught that self awareness is an important element of life. It opens doors to greater understanding and happiness. It had always been at the back of my mind but like I mentioned before- learning, understanding and integrating are completely different matters. You can know one thing and think you know it until you finally understand it years later and then realise what it really means to you yet again, years later.
It is during your challenges that you discover who you are. In the wake of the terrible mess on the markets and the fiasco with the Lehman issue, disheartenment has weighed heavily on many advisors' heart, including my own. It is at this point that I realise, that perhaps this business does not suit me. I am not mercenary enough for my own good, especially my wallet's. I've even questioned if I actually suit the modern world. A friend of mine commented that she felt I should be somewhere that allows me to help people more and in a more direct manner.
It is also at this point that I realise the little changes that have grown into huge differences in me over the last few years. While the sense of materialism still exists, it has become more and more apparent to me that I am now valuing other things with far greater significance. It isn't that money isn't important. It's just that the realisation of what money means is greater. Gone are the days where I would want to have millions but not be able to answer how many. I can answer now but the truth is, the importance of it is no longer as gripping. Have I settled? Actually no. I don't necessarily feel compromised. Instead, I feel a greater sense of awareness of who I might have been born to truly become. I have learnt to let go of things more and in return, find greater peace.
It is this sense of awareness that led me to appreciate the significance of self-awareness. The other day, a thought occurred to me suddenly. It has never crossed my mind but somehow it did that day. I realised the number one thing I would like to be in my life and also the number two thing that I would like to do alongside number one. When I thought about it, I realised they fitted me more in terms of love, passion, personality, beliefs and direction. It was like I finally had an idea of how the ideal design of my life would be. The discovery of this design has brought a new sense of calm and purpose amidst the current storms brewing around me.
Any self respecting believer of self-improvement would have probably been asked to draw up a picture or design of one's ideal life at some point. It has occurred to me that when most people were asked to do it, they were frankly clueless. I was clueless. Hence, we often took the easy way out and almost haphazardly wrote whatever came to mind in the form of what we felt and thought we wanted.
Most of the time, there is some truth to the things that we write because it is a reflection of one's desires in life after all. However, it is now years later that I began to truly appreciate the meaning behind the effort that the self-improvement gurus have gone into asking one to consider one's belief and value system before writing that down. I can say with some degree of confidence that most people did not really think it over as much as they thought they did.
I say so because I am looking at the design in my head now and comparing it to the design I had then. I can happily say that I am far more pleased and aligned with this design that the one I had then. The difference is that this is the one that I drew up, according to my beliefs, what I want to do, can do and feel that I was meant to do. It has far more significance and meaning that what others have influenced me to believe that I need. For that, I feel a lot happier, at ease and most importantly, aligned with myself.
If you had a free hand, what would the design of your ideal life be like?
I have always been taught that self awareness is an important element of life. It opens doors to greater understanding and happiness. It had always been at the back of my mind but like I mentioned before- learning, understanding and integrating are completely different matters. You can know one thing and think you know it until you finally understand it years later and then realise what it really means to you yet again, years later.
It is during your challenges that you discover who you are. In the wake of the terrible mess on the markets and the fiasco with the Lehman issue, disheartenment has weighed heavily on many advisors' heart, including my own. It is at this point that I realise, that perhaps this business does not suit me. I am not mercenary enough for my own good, especially my wallet's. I've even questioned if I actually suit the modern world. A friend of mine commented that she felt I should be somewhere that allows me to help people more and in a more direct manner.
It is also at this point that I realise the little changes that have grown into huge differences in me over the last few years. While the sense of materialism still exists, it has become more and more apparent to me that I am now valuing other things with far greater significance. It isn't that money isn't important. It's just that the realisation of what money means is greater. Gone are the days where I would want to have millions but not be able to answer how many. I can answer now but the truth is, the importance of it is no longer as gripping. Have I settled? Actually no. I don't necessarily feel compromised. Instead, I feel a greater sense of awareness of who I might have been born to truly become. I have learnt to let go of things more and in return, find greater peace.
It is this sense of awareness that led me to appreciate the significance of self-awareness. The other day, a thought occurred to me suddenly. It has never crossed my mind but somehow it did that day. I realised the number one thing I would like to be in my life and also the number two thing that I would like to do alongside number one. When I thought about it, I realised they fitted me more in terms of love, passion, personality, beliefs and direction. It was like I finally had an idea of how the ideal design of my life would be. The discovery of this design has brought a new sense of calm and purpose amidst the current storms brewing around me.
Any self respecting believer of self-improvement would have probably been asked to draw up a picture or design of one's ideal life at some point. It has occurred to me that when most people were asked to do it, they were frankly clueless. I was clueless. Hence, we often took the easy way out and almost haphazardly wrote whatever came to mind in the form of what we felt and thought we wanted.
Most of the time, there is some truth to the things that we write because it is a reflection of one's desires in life after all. However, it is now years later that I began to truly appreciate the meaning behind the effort that the self-improvement gurus have gone into asking one to consider one's belief and value system before writing that down. I can say with some degree of confidence that most people did not really think it over as much as they thought they did.
I say so because I am looking at the design in my head now and comparing it to the design I had then. I can happily say that I am far more pleased and aligned with this design that the one I had then. The difference is that this is the one that I drew up, according to my beliefs, what I want to do, can do and feel that I was meant to do. It has far more significance and meaning that what others have influenced me to believe that I need. For that, I feel a lot happier, at ease and most importantly, aligned with myself.
If you had a free hand, what would the design of your ideal life be like?
If
I got this from...surprise surprise....the guy who sends me market updates everyday. No doubt a response to the current turmoil in the markets.
If
by Rudyard Kipling
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!
If
by Rudyard Kipling
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Always In The Right Place
A phrase has been coming into my mind these few days...
"You are always in the right place at the right time."
I first came across a phrase like that in the song "Welcome To Wherever You Are" by Bon Jovi.
Maybe we're different, but we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden, running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You come between just who you are and who you wanna be
If you feel alone, and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning, is some beginning's end
[Chorus]
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are
When everybody's in, and you're left out
And you feel your drowning, in a shadow of a doubt
Everyones a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say
When it seems you're lost, alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different
Just take a look around
[Chorus]
Be who you want to, be who you are
Everyones a hero, everyone's a star
When you wanna give up, and your hearts about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God makes no mistakes
I then came across the same phrase in a reading I had which told me that I must always believe that I was right where I was supposed to be.
I don't know why this came to my mind again recently but I do realise that more often than not, we wish we were somewhere else, doing something else, being someone else other than where, what and who we are now. Sometimes we look back and cringe at things we have done, said or places we have showed up in.
I know because I cringe too. However, whenever someone asked me if I would change anything if I had a chance to relive everything again, my answer was surprisingly no. Well, as embarrassing as some things may be and as much as I wished I did certain things better, I realise that without them, I wouldn't have learnt things that I am now grateful for. So I think I would have probably lived through most of it again.
Sometimes, it isn't even the big things. You may think that it's useless now but it could come back to you in a big way and make a difference to your life somewhere down the road. I still remember a speech given by Steve Jobs a few years ago. One of the things he talked about was the calligraphy classes he took back in university which seemed utterly useless on the practical scale then. Ten years later, it is the reason behind why Mac became the first computer with beautiful typography.
I have always loved dance and my foray into dance was really rather accidental, borne out of curiousity than passion. The passion only came later. The move into salsa was also the same, a seemingly small unpractical hobby that has now turned into a teaching vocation; a vocation that has offered some monetary assistance in times when my main business is taking a hit from the markets.
My interest in all things Korean also came out of an accident. I happened to watch excerpts of a serial at a foodcourt in Tampines. For some reason, I picked up the drama which I usually hated and watched it. That started my interest in Rain and Kpop. Now you may wonder what's the relevance and significance. It was my eventual discovery of DBSK and fanfics that sparked my interest to write fiction. That happens to be a huge love in my life now. Discovery of a lifetime, you may say.
All from seemingly small, useless, unpractical loves, habits and quirks.
Maybe there are days where we dread to be where we are at but maybe within the wheels of fate, there is a reason why one is there which will unfold in many days to come.
So next time you think that you are not in the right place, think again. It may seem the case but in the grand scale of things and days to come, it may just be the right place for you to be in, at the right time.
"You are always in the right place at the right time."
I first came across a phrase like that in the song "Welcome To Wherever You Are" by Bon Jovi.
Maybe we're different, but we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden, running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You come between just who you are and who you wanna be
If you feel alone, and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning, is some beginning's end
[Chorus]
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are
When everybody's in, and you're left out
And you feel your drowning, in a shadow of a doubt
Everyones a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say
When it seems you're lost, alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different
Just take a look around
[Chorus]
Be who you want to, be who you are
Everyones a hero, everyone's a star
When you wanna give up, and your hearts about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God makes no mistakes
I then came across the same phrase in a reading I had which told me that I must always believe that I was right where I was supposed to be.
I don't know why this came to my mind again recently but I do realise that more often than not, we wish we were somewhere else, doing something else, being someone else other than where, what and who we are now. Sometimes we look back and cringe at things we have done, said or places we have showed up in.
I know because I cringe too. However, whenever someone asked me if I would change anything if I had a chance to relive everything again, my answer was surprisingly no. Well, as embarrassing as some things may be and as much as I wished I did certain things better, I realise that without them, I wouldn't have learnt things that I am now grateful for. So I think I would have probably lived through most of it again.
Sometimes, it isn't even the big things. You may think that it's useless now but it could come back to you in a big way and make a difference to your life somewhere down the road. I still remember a speech given by Steve Jobs a few years ago. One of the things he talked about was the calligraphy classes he took back in university which seemed utterly useless on the practical scale then. Ten years later, it is the reason behind why Mac became the first computer with beautiful typography.
I have always loved dance and my foray into dance was really rather accidental, borne out of curiousity than passion. The passion only came later. The move into salsa was also the same, a seemingly small unpractical hobby that has now turned into a teaching vocation; a vocation that has offered some monetary assistance in times when my main business is taking a hit from the markets.
My interest in all things Korean also came out of an accident. I happened to watch excerpts of a serial at a foodcourt in Tampines. For some reason, I picked up the drama which I usually hated and watched it. That started my interest in Rain and Kpop. Now you may wonder what's the relevance and significance. It was my eventual discovery of DBSK and fanfics that sparked my interest to write fiction. That happens to be a huge love in my life now. Discovery of a lifetime, you may say.
All from seemingly small, useless, unpractical loves, habits and quirks.
Maybe there are days where we dread to be where we are at but maybe within the wheels of fate, there is a reason why one is there which will unfold in many days to come.
So next time you think that you are not in the right place, think again. It may seem the case but in the grand scale of things and days to come, it may just be the right place for you to be in, at the right time.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Look Forward
Got this through email but it's really good :)
---------------------------------------------
DO NOT LOOK BACK AND ASK WHY, LOOK FORWARD AND ASK WHY NOT
A very valuable lesson to learn ...
Interesting quote from the movie 'Why did I get married?' In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship.
There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship.
But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had. Be careful in deciding between what you WANT and NEED in your life.
Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. 'Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is not'
Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did. Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%.
Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: 'I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . ..' Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt Or because your husband is the quiettype, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host. But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have. Don't throw away the 80% that you already have!
That's not all. Add to your spouse's 80% the 100% that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers. Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have.
But I'm not just talking about marriage. I'm talking about life! About your jobs. About your friends. About your children. About your lifestyles. Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? 'They have got more leg room! Oh my, their food is served in porcelain! Wow, their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!'I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip!
Don't live your life like that. Forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class -- because they are not riding in a private Lear Jet?
The main message???If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class!
---------------------------------------------
DO NOT LOOK BACK AND ASK WHY, LOOK FORWARD AND ASK WHY NOT
A very valuable lesson to learn ...
Interesting quote from the movie 'Why did I get married?' In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship.
There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship.
But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had. Be careful in deciding between what you WANT and NEED in your life.
Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. 'Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is not'
Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did. Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%.
Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: 'I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . ..' Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt Or because your husband is the quiettype, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host. But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have. Don't throw away the 80% that you already have!
That's not all. Add to your spouse's 80% the 100% that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers. Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have.
But I'm not just talking about marriage. I'm talking about life! About your jobs. About your friends. About your children. About your lifestyles. Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? 'They have got more leg room! Oh my, their food is served in porcelain! Wow, their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!'I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip!
Don't live your life like that. Forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class -- because they are not riding in a private Lear Jet?
The main message???If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class!
Sunday, September 28, 2008
LV
I must say in terms of some areas of my life, the pressure has been a lot better than what it used to be even as new pressures come in.
I always believe the most important duty a child has to his or her parents is to first and foremost, live well. I believe so because I believe that is the wish that all parents have for their children.
Still, I would like to be able to walk into Louis Vuitton one day and tell Mum "just choose anything you want and I will buy it for you." I am not a LV fan but Mum is.
And because positive thinking is more important than anything else, it will not be "would like to..someday" but I will walk into LV and do that one day.
I always believe the most important duty a child has to his or her parents is to first and foremost, live well. I believe so because I believe that is the wish that all parents have for their children.
Still, I would like to be able to walk into Louis Vuitton one day and tell Mum "just choose anything you want and I will buy it for you." I am not a LV fan but Mum is.
And because positive thinking is more important than anything else, it will not be "would like to..someday" but I will walk into LV and do that one day.
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